Category: 31 Day Challenge (Page 2 of 7)

Some might call me stubborn, but I prefer to think that I have perseverance.

Webster’s defines perseverance as “continued effort to do or achieve something, despite difficulties, failures or opposition.”

According to dictionary.com the theological meaning is “continuance in a state of grace to the end.” Wow. Think about that for a few minutes.

This evening I was trying to find some inspiration for today and for finishing this 31 day challenge (5 more posts after this one). I stumbled across this verse from James 1:2-3

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.

Based on the definition we just looked at, we should have joy, because the trials produces perseverance, or a continuance in a state of grace to the end.

Finding joy during times of trials is not as easy as it sounds. But we must remember that joy and happiness are NOT the same thing. We have all heard that before, but what does it really mean?

My personal description is that joy is internal and happiness is external. I can find momentary happiness when I am surrounded by people at a party. But when I am alone, it is joy that comforts me.

Unfortunately, our family has had its share of trials this year, but through a continued state of grace – perseverance there can still be joy.

So as we move into the upcoming month of Thanksgiving, remember to say thanks for those trials that have tested your faith producing perseverance.

There is one week left in this 31 Day writing challenge. When I began, I thought it would be about our discovery of a new life after my husband’s diagnosis. Then, as the month progressed, it became a way for me to find and share encouragement from the bible.

Some days were easy, some were harder.

I thought the discovery of our new life would be enough to keep the writing going. When I was diagnosed it seemed like things moved at lightening speed. But I have found out through this process that each person’s cancer journey is unique.

I have learned patience. Patience with the doctors. Patience with the process. Patience with my husband.

Ephesians 4:2

Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.

I’m not sure if I truly understood this until this month. While I was the one who needed caring for, my husband was patient, humble and gentle (most of the time). Realizing that he has done that for twelve years is very humbling to me.

I had no idea how patient he had been until it was my turn to demonstrate patience.

When we came home from the hospital, he was very weak. He was unable to do much around the house. He did not have any appetite. He was unable to do the things that he had been doing primarily for the last 5 years since my cancer returned.

Perhaps patience is not the right word, but I have learned to ask before I sit down if he needs anything else. I have learned to not respond sharply when I can’t understand what he says. I have learned to be attentive to how he moves and when he is in pain.

This has been a huge change for us. While I don’t think I took advantage of this, I did allow him to do a lot of things for me that I may have been able to do. In the beginning, I was unable to do much because of where the cancer attacked (I will be continuing that story in November when the challenge is over), but over time I have learned how to adjust.

Now, as I serve my husband in this new role, I realize that the patience and the gentleness is so much easier because it comes from a place of love.

If we act out of love then patience, humility and gentleness will flow easily.

Friends that we have known our entire married life brought dinner tonight (we are blessed to have great people helping us out since the cancer diagnosis). As we were in the kitchen getting things together to eat, one of them told me “It wasn’t what we planned.”

I laughed and replied, “Well, there isn’t much going on in my life right now that I planned.”

Our friends like to cook on the grill. Steaks, brisket, sausage, pretty much anything. They were going to barbecue a brisket and come over to watch football. The rain (we live in Texas) today put a kink in that plan. So instead, they got some pre-cooked brisket and sausage from the store.

It was still an awesome dinner. Just not what they had planned. We enjoyed the food and the company.

If you haven’t realized by now that life does not always turn out as planned, then I would love to meet you and know your secret.

If I had been asked in high school to describe my life in 2015, I’m am certain it would not look anything like what my life looks like now.

In 1984, I was graduating from High School and heading off to college. I had no idea what I was majoring in. I had no idea where life would lead. I’m sure I thought that I would be married (ok, got that one right) and that I would have kids (got that one, too).

But the path that has lead me to where I am now is nothing like I would have drawn out, for example:

• I graduated from college and moved to Washington, D.C. I worked in public accounting for a year and thought I really wanted to live in “the big city.” A year passed and I was ready to move back to Texas. I worked in Dallas for several years until I got married (see below). I was a city girl. Fast forward to 2015, I live in a town with a population of 800 and while I miss the ability to run to the store, I do not miss the hustle and bustle of people crowding me where ever I am.
• I married a football coach. I expected to be married to a football coach for years to come. But life changed and my husband changed careers. He has been involved with grass-fed beef at the family farm and is an consultant for farmers that want to go organic. As a kid I never even went to a farm except for one time when I rode with my grandfather in his milk truck (he picked up milk from dairies, it was quite an experience). Farming was not in my long range plans.
• In 2003, I was first diagnosed with cancer (certainly wasn’t part of the plan – you can read more about that here). That changed my plans again. I worked for a school district and was doing well. With two young daughters, we made the jump to pursuing the dream of our own business in the organic consulting field.

So life has once again thrown us a curve ball and we are adjusting to what this new life looks like. It was not in our plans. But, just like our dinner tonight, we make adjustments when life isn’t what we planned.

Top 5 things I’m thankful for today:

1. My family. I have two beautiful, smart daughters that I am super proud of. They both make me smile everyday and I’m so glad that I get to be their mom. I have a wonderful husband. He loves me beyond anything I could have ever imagined. He did so many things for me that I never even noticed until these past few weeks.
2. My friends. I cannot even believe the amount of support our friends have showed us during this new journey. It is not just the meals, but it is the prayers, the hugs, the texts. The escape to a movie, picking up a cup of coffee for me. Little things done out of love that I will never be able to repay. The hands and feet of God have been shown to our family.
3. The internet. Sounds kind of cheesy, but the internet makes it so much easier to keep everyone up to date on what is going on without having to rehash it every time I’m on the phone. Facebook, Caringbridge.org, even this blog. They all allow me to share the story without feeling overwhelmed.
4. Rain. After all we do live in Texas. We are expecting a fair amount of rain this weekend which we have not seen in several months. I pray that the rain will not lead to flooding, but instead will refresh the land, replenish the lakes, and cool things off so that we can enjoy some Fall like weather.
5. My Faith. I am tired tonight. But I know that God does not grow tired or weary. I can lean on Him. Although I may not understand what is going on around me, He is everlasting and loves me. When I am tired, God will give me rest.

Today’s verse comes from Matthew 11:28

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.